Mood:  a-ok

Well, we got the results back. For those of you who may be knew, I have been blogging off and on about my three sons' health problems. We are a very unique family. All three of our children have had fairly serious life-changing things happen to them.

My oldest was stricken with a rare eye cancer at 15 months old. He is now 14 years old and cancer free, but has an artificial left eye.

My middle, 9 year old, was diagnosed with asperger's syndrome about two years ago. We had been struggling and going from doctor to doctor for years with out any satisfaction. Finally we know what it is and are learning how to handle it, but it has been a difficult journey.

That brings us to our four year old. Very early on he seemed like a normal toddler. Until about a year ago when he was stricken with a severe rash and fever while we were out of town. A quick trip to a pharmacist solved the rash and fever, but his behavior changed overnight. We have taken him to doctor after doctor and still don't have a satisfying diagnosis, but he is doing okay.

Recently we had some genetic testing done with him and found that he was missing part of his ninth chromosome. We worried and fretted until we could finally get with the geneticist to learn more. When we got there, they told us that this was very rare and they didn't have a whole lot of information on it yet. They wanted to testing on Sarah and I to see if he inherited the problem. Well, we got the results back yesterday. And it's all my fault! I am missing the same part of the ninth chromosome. It came down from my line. That still doesn't help the problem much, but at least we know that I turned out...uh hum...fairly normal, so that can't be the main problem.

So, we're still trying to find out what's going on. All the boys are in some type of therapy - either physical, occupational, or speech - and all are doing some better. We have learned some more significant things recently that I'll talk about in another post. But for now, you can blame it all on me...it's all my fault!

Subscribe to Families Again

Mood:  not sure

Recently it seems that the Metadate has not been working as well. Joshua has been having many more meltdowns and behavior problems. Sarah has mentioned that it could be the change in schedule and perhaps even the hot and humid days, but we decided to mention it to our doctor. He suggested switching his medications to Strattera. It's supposed to be a non-stimulant which really excited me at first, because stimulants are the things that you want to avoid - aren't they? No, though, since I've been asking about Strattera and doing some research, I am not hearing such favorable comments. One parent said that three weeks into it her seven year old child was saying things like "It would have been better if I wasn't even born". She warned to make sure that we keep an eye on his behavior and if there is any change (other than the desired calmness) to call the doctor immediately and take him off of the medication as they did with their child.

I'm just not sure what to do. Any change in medication really concerns me. Sarah's going to pick up the prescription tomorrow, but I think I am going to tell her to hold off giving it to him for a day or two and let us pray about it. Please pray along with us. It's probably not going to have any side effects, but it is still scary to think about. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Just as a background, we are not on a diet such as gluten free, but we do try to stick to healthy eating habits. Maybe we need to try to go gluten free. It would be a big step for us. Please pray. Thanks!

Subscribe to Families Again

Mood:  don't ask

Not really, but it got you to look didn't it?!?

Really, though, this year of planning is driving me up the wall! We have always been very eclectic in our homeschooling. We have never gone with just one canned curriculum that covered all subjects. We pick our subjects depending on the strengths and weaknesses of our children and of a particular curriculum. For example, John Allen does wonderful with reading good "living books" for history. He has learned some much from reading good historical novels and discussing them than he would ever have from reading some boring historical textbook. Joshua, on the other hand, requires a little more structure and flourishes with hands on things.  

Well, anyway, this year is no different. We are picking a very eclectic mix of curriculum and subjects. This time, however, to save money, I've chosen to put together John Allen's World History curriculum myself. So, I've looked at some book lists from some good World History curriculum and I have most of his books picked out. I also have some lapbooks and unit studies chosen to supplement the books. But, putting it all down on paper and writing down when he should read this and when he should do that is driving me up the wall. Before, I always had a teachers book that told me what to assign to him and what to tell him to do. We never did it all and often did other things that complimented the study as well, but at least we had a guide. This time around I have to figure it all out myself. AHHHHHH!

Then, if that isn't bad enough, I bought a Spanish textbook at a library sale. John Allen has wanted to learn Spanish for a long time. The textbook had a pronunciation CD with it that went corresponded with each chapter so I thought it would be great. After looking at the book I saw that it also had a great on-line website with flashcards, practice quizzes and more. The only problem was that I didn't look close enough at the book. I thought it covered things a little more quickly than what I remembered in high school, but I wasn't ready for the surprise when I finally realized it was a COLLEGE textbook! So, I'm trying to divide it into bite size bits and stretching it out to fill up a year instead of a semester. John Allen doesn't know that it's a college textbook and I'm not telling him! It's going to be an interesting year.

BUT, that's not all! He's also decided he wants to continue with Latin again this year. He has taken Latin off and on all three years that we have homeschooled, but last year, instead of doing regular Latin, we just studied Latin and Greek roots. This year he wants to really study Latin again. So, a high school Latin curriculum is ordered. These, along with, physical science and pre-algebra/algebra should make for a challenging year for him...and me!

Joshua is going to be a little easier. The Download-N-Go curriculum that we are reviewing this year covers a lot of science and social studies in a fun and interesting way. We are going to continue with Rocket Phonics and McGuffey Readers for reading and keep using Language Smarts for language. Wrapping it all up will be Math Mammoth this year. So he is set without a lot of planning.

Jacob is even going to join in this year as we begin phonics and more math with him, so he will be like his big brothers.

Call me crazy? Maybe I am, but I enjoy it. Just pray for my sanity. As the old movie line says "get ready for a bumpy ride"!

Subscribe to Families Again

Mood:  down

We came in last night and found out that the doctor from Vanderbilt had called yesterday morning to talk to us about Jacob's genetic testing results. By the time we got the message it was too late to call. We got up early this morning only to find out she was in clinicals all day. Finally she called around four this afternoon.

It seems that the testing came back that a part of Jacob's ninth chromosome is missing and that there was an increased level of amino acids. She told us that this was not her specialty, and she was sending us to another genetic specialist that could explain it better and answer our questions. She explained that they would probably want to do genetic testing on Sarah and I as well and that they would call next week to set up an appointment.

So, we continue to wait with mixed emotions. The "I want an answer now" side of me has been searching on the computer trying to figure out what it could all mean. The search has fluctuated between really scary and not quite as scary but still not fun. I really don't know what to think. All I know is that there is something wrong with my little boy and it doesn't look like it's going to be an easy fix. I'm scared and I hurt and I just want it to go away.

I'm fighting the urge to not yell at God and ask "Why? Why again!" When Jacob was born we thought that perhaps we were finally going to have a regular, normal, child. It's not that we don't love John Allen or Joshua, but we have seen what cancer did to John Allen, and what being on the autism spectrum has done to Joshua. We just wanted a child who didn't have to suffer. We wanted a child who didn't have to worry about only having one eye and having no depth perception. We desired a child who wouldn't have problems with social skills. Who wouldn't do something not normal and then cry because he doesn't understand why his friends are rejecting him. We just wanted a normal child.

Now, however, we know that we don't have a normal child and we hurt for him. We have been down this path before I guess, but that doesn't make it any easier on us or on our family.

And so we wait. We wait on yet another phone call and another doctor's visit. We search the internet for answers when we really shouldn't because it really does no good. We blame ourselves even though we don't know why. We cry. And we wait. I hate waiting. I hate seeing my child in pain. I hate feeling helpless. I hate getting mad at God. I hate feeling empty inside. I hate snapping at people because I'm stressed.

I just hate the whole thing. But I know that I have to go through it. For my child, for my family and for myself. I'm not really mad at God. God is my hope and my salvation. I hope soon that we can get back to normal - whatever normal is. Until then, please pray for us and for our family. We'll be OK. It's just one of those days. I'm just feeling a little down this evening.

Subscribe to Families Again

Mood:  sad

Yesterday Joshua had to learn a lesson the hard way, and today John Allen had to learn a lesson the hard way. No physical injuries but hurts just as badly.

Today was the Tennessee State BB Gun Championships. John Allen was wanting to do well after having a great season last year, and coming in fifth this year at the pre-state match.The only problem was, he didn't want to put as much of an effort in this year as he did last year.

Last year we practiced a lot. We went every Saturday to regular practice then went one or two days to the range to practice more. How many days did we go this year. NONE! It was not entirely his fault. With all of the problems we've been having with Jacob, there wasn't as much time. But, we did have some. Unfortunately every time I had the time and urged him to go, he didn't want to go.

Well, is showed today. Today was probably one of his worst matches. Amazingly enough, he has never placed in an individual position before and today he did. The one position that he did well in he placed either second or third. They are going to recheck the targets and let us know.

Oh well, we had already said that we were going to sit the International competition out this year so that he could go next year ~ the last year he's able. The rules say that you can't go two years in a row, so if he went this year, he couldn't go next. He feels bad, but hopefully he's learned his lesson. If you want to excel at something you have to put forth the effort.

Pictures will be posted when we get them.

Subscribe to Families Again